It has been a while since my last post because, well, we are in the midst of a pandemic and things have been pretty hectic. Coronavirus has raised the bar for my Mommy and Doctor duties to an entirely new level, a stressful level, an emotional level. Like many of you, I have been struggling to figure out how to navigate this new existence, where expectations, routines and guidelines change everyday, sometimes every hour. And I’ve been struggling to figure out what to do with all of these emotions – my emotions, my kids’ emotions, my patients’ emotions.

I was talking to a good friend who is a psychologist about coping with all of these emotions and she gave me a 3 step approach:

1.) Name and experience the emotion
2.) Figure out what you need in order to be able to continue to effectively function with that emotion
3.) Do the thing you figured out in #2.

Now I could take up several posts listing all of the emotions I have felt over the past few weeks but I’ll start with the main one: overwhelmed. I have been overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information that is coming at me every day and every minute. Overwhelmed by the responsibility to make sure my children continue to learn and thrive educationally with the schools shut down. Overwhelmed by all of the steps it takes to truly cancel everything that we had planned from spring break through the summer. Naming the emotion was not hard but making myself sit down and feel it – that was tough. I had been running around on full throttle trying to handle everything – it felt like I was in a 3 on 1 tennis match, and I don’t even play tennis! And when I sat to really examine what I was feeling, it was scary. When I allowed myself to truly acknowledge how overwhelmed I was, I kind of felt like I was drowning. But I sat there, and I felt it, and after a few minutes the drowning sensation dissipated and my mind began to clear. I realized that being overwhelmed was not going to go away anytime soon. And I also realized that in order to be able to effectively function while going through this experience, I need to take breaks.

Taking breaks is easier said than done. But it’s necessary and vital to my ability to not only survive but thrive in this time. So I had to go back to principles I discussed in my post Do Nothing…It’s Good For You and actually schedule breaks. Waking up in the morning, I am not immediately reaching for my phone to check developments overnight. I’m taking time to breathe, center and prepare for the day before diving into my email and social media. I’m taking breaks to remain physically active. I’m taking breaks to connect with friends and family via FaceTime and Zoom. And I’m taking breaks to do simple, non tech things with my family like play “kitchen” with our daughter, Candyland with our son or trying new recipes (stay tuned for that post!). Before going to bed at night, instead of checking email one more time, I’m reading a book or listening to a meditation. That will all be there when I wake up.

What we are experiencing is unprecedented and it is definitely a marathon, not a sprint. Our typical coping mechanisms may not be enough to deal with new and more intense emotions. Taking the time to name it, feel it and deal with it will be important. Doing that will clear the space we need to still find some joy and peace in each day. Stay safe out there and, please, STAY HOME!